apollo-cackling:
biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:
so if demons are sticklers for contracts, demand high payment for their services, and have firm/specific rules regarding summoning rituals (aka the hiring process & availability of their labor)—what i’m hearing is demons are fully unionized
[transcript:
#imagine what their strikes are like #it’d be especially funny if they did the version of striking where they do actually keep doing their duties #but they refuse to take payment #(i’ve heard of some transportation or medical workers doing this in the past but i’d have to look up sources idk)
#my point is you summon a demon and try to enter into a contract and they’re like #you can have it for free i’m just here so i don’t get bored during the strike #the boss doesn’t get his cut this way but i can still traverse the planes and fuck shit up
#and you’re like?? this has to be a trick?? #but then the walls start bleeding and satan starts writing angry strike busting threats on the walls ominously #and the demon is like just ignore that he can’t do shit without us it’s all talk let’s get back to the details#now who were you wanting to fuck over with my evil specialized skills that absolutely deserve fair compensation?
#and you’re just nervously glancing over to the increasingly furious scribblings from the king of hell on your wall while stuttering #uhhh this asshole jerry from work #and the demon is just like say no more! i gotchu #enjoy keeping your soul i’m sure it is so juicy and would be so fun for satan to torture for eternity oh well#sucks to be him he should really come back to negotiations then huh
/end transcript]
(via biggest-gaudiest-patronuses)