April 2011
March 2011
Oh.
Somewhere in the last few posts I wrote, “I don’t think you want me to love you.” After which it then dawned on me that that is what I feel. That I don’t think you want me to love you. That somehow, this all got started and you thought you’d wanted something but perhaps…
Who knows.
Hesitance,
really ought to not be here. Not at this moment. Not under these conditions.
Why don’t I want to leave my bed?
“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants....”
– Eat, Pray Love (via hopelivelovelaugh)
That’s it, I’m re-reading this book.
“One trivial moment, is all it takes for you to see a side of somebody that...”
– (via hopelivelovelaugh)
I don’t think you really want me to love you.
“She says nothing at all, but simply stares upward into the dark sky and watches,...”
– Neil Gaiman (via comablood)
(I shouldn’t need you, love. That’s the thing. I shouldn’t need you. I should want you, yes, more than I could express. But if I’m needing you that isn’t love the way it ought to be. That’s a state of dependence which only ever...
“When we were children, we used to think that when we grew up, we would no longer...”
– Madeleine L’Engle (via makingdens)
“If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are...”
– Lao Tzu (via rougestilettos, maluna) (via fortheloveofpretty) (via hopelivelovelaugh)
“I know it is hard to accept, but an upset in your life is beneficial, in that...”
– (via hopelivelovelaugh)
“All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave...”
– Anatole France (via misswallflower)
“You deserve someone who loves you with every single beat of his heart, someone...”
– Cecelia Ahern (Love, Rosie)
And I so love you this way, darling boy. But already it feels as though there is so much of me that you do not.
“We were never lovers, and we never will be, now. I do not regret that, however....”
– The Sandman: The Wake, Neil Gaiman (via 8346757) (via neilgaiman) (via lovebot) (via hopelivelovelaugh)
I wonder how different my life would have been had I not met S.
“We all have the potential to fall in love a thousand times in our lifetime. It’s...”
– Chuck Klosterman (via feistyfrenziedfervent)
“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It...”
– Neil Gaiman (via feistyfrenziedfervent)
This love, this quote is the difference between you and me. You wouldn’t ever read this and think, “Oh, yes, that is love.” But I do. It won’t be anything but that difference that leads to our ruin.
feisty frenzied fervent: I tried to ignore it. Not... →
I tried to ignore it. Not because I didn’t want it. Not because I knew it would be so dear to me, but because I knew that if I let you in, that far and you left, like everyone else, I would be so broken. I chose others. I let others in. Now that I think about it, it was because I needed to see…
M: All at once you want them and you don’t.
T: That sounds like a very confusing place to be.
M: It’s practically as bad as all at once being so sure you exist, and being completely convinced that you’re not real at all. You feel like your soul might actually split in two to accomodate the competition between the ideas; to keep you from being destroyed.
M: It’s this confusing place where you’re all at once happy that you met them and completely pissed that you did.
T: Why?
M: Because it may have been painful at times to be alone, but the risk was smaller. Because they’re precisely what I want except that the future has already been delimited to an extent that there isn’t much point in hoping for it. Because I’m...
“she was not who she had been. She felt parts of herself softly crumbling off, like a cliff falling into the sea.”
Chill the eff out (awesome blog entry) →
“They’re fucking gross, man. Look, I love beautiful girls too. I think everyone...”
– Amy Poehler on American Apparel (via noonewillloveyoumore)
Oh Amy Poehler. You’re intelligence and humor are so unbelievably attractive universally (I believe).
“I wish love was like volleyball. When you say ‘mine,’ everyone would back off,...”
– Sarah Dessen | wiishuponastar (via quote-book)
I’m glad I’m learning how to hold you then, love. And love you. And breathe enough in my own life to be a reason for you to be happy in yours.
Dear Universe,
One paradigm shift at a time, please! Loving someone on top of the end of college is freaking me out as is… no more.
Fair Warning
between school, finishing up some stuff at the museum, work with student groups, and my personal life I’m probably going to be abandoning this for a little bit this term.
Who knew that it would be so simple as opening yourself up to being loved? Who knew that all it took was me allowing the possibility to find you? I expected it to be so much more difficult that this has knocked me right off my feet and left me feeling a bit unsure about standing up again.
But you are so good, and to love you and be loved by you creates such happiness.
